Sweet Dreams

Oh, you pretty little lump,
Laying on the ground, you flail
Your arms grasp, feet kick,
Further, and further, you slip
Down, down to the darkness of death.
You cry out for help
Yet music still pounds
Loudly, as my axe makes canals
For your sweet blood to flow,
Crashing on the floor.
Finally, your heart stops,
And I discard
Your severed body
and hang your head with the rest.
Sweet dreams, my love,
And now you may sleep.

A dungeons and dragons reference.

As many people who play D&D, the bugbear is a kind, forgiving animal and is closely related to the hobgoblin. This is my story of how one can love such a creature.

There sits a certain love for a being,

An animal that dwells in caves at night.

Could naught compare to the act of seeing

Something as beautiful as such the sight

Of you, my darling, sweet, and cuddly bugbear?

You feast only in the glow of the moon,

But your victims’ cries of pain, I can hear

Tearing limb from limb, you care not to swoon.

Peeping through a hole, I spot your brown hair,

It is grimy and splattered with some blood.

Once I strip your skin, I shall have a pair,

To hang lovingly over my mantle to brood.

My darling, sweet bugbear, should you exist,

You would be the greatest game, I insist.

As you can see, bugbears are gentle and would be something that you would want to have sleeping at the foot of your bed.
Here he is:

 

A fun limerick:

This one is a personal favorite, it soothes the mind and therefore is a great one to tell your children and grandchildren before they go to sleep.


There once was a madman from Maine,
Who, though relentless, went insane.
He got locked in his house,
And murdered his spouse,
And no more, he felt such great pain.


It really assures the four to ten year old that yes, their daddy will be fine. Once Mommy goes away for a long... long time.